Are you afraid you are not doing enough?
Are you constantly on the move, thinking you can't sit down. Slowing down simply is not an option?
Even worse, do you find that you are anxious when you are relaxing? Even to the point of allowing panic to set in and instead of relaxing you end up more stressed?
I get it, I have been there. Actually still a bit there (it is a process to get it under control.)
It took me till my early 30’s to realize I could not do everything. And that only came about because my son was born.
It was not till my 40’s that I decided I needed to learn how to not do anything. To just be. After all it is not healthy to be constantly on the go - stress is dangerous for our health.
It has been quite the journey to learn to just be. To watch an entire movie without doing something else at the same time. Or to just sit outside and enjoy the weather. No reading, no working on the phone - just enjoying.
Each of these came with stress. Learning to change from worrying about not doing enough to being able to relax and know that what needs to get done will get done - is hard work! (Ironic I know!)
Following are some of the tools that helped me manage this process. (Side note, the big changes did not come till I figured out the cause of my fear of not doing enough. So make sure you are working on that too!)
Steps to Overcome Your Fear of Not Doing Enough
List What You Have Done
Create a list of either everything you've done that day or that year. Which time frame I pick depends on what my current stress point is. Sometimes I am worried I did not accomplish enough in the day. Other times it is a big panic about not doing enough in the year or my life!
This is something most of us with the fear of not doing enough typically don’t do. After all we have more stuff to do! But acknowledging what has been accomplished helps us see, that yes we are doing things. Our minds can tend to convince us we did nothing.
Find the Biggest Problem
Ask yourself if there is one specific item that is causing you to not do enough. Often times I run around in a panic about doing more, when really there is only one item bothering me. Once I figure out what it is, then take steps to do it the stress starts to go away.
Understand That You Need Balance Too
Ask yourself if there is a way that you could have done more while keeping balance. The important part of this question is in the word balance. Could you have done more? The answer is almost always - absolutely. Would it have taken you out of balance to do more? Yes! Maintaining some form of life balance is important. Otherwise you burnout and endanger your health.
Talk to a Friend
It always helps to have a friend or counselor that you can call when you get yourself overwhelmed. My friends know that I feel like I am never doing enough. So when I am really anxious and can't seem to calm down, I call a friend. They often start with making me do step one if I have not already. It helps to have a rational mind calm you down.
Prioritize Self Care
Make sure you have a solid self care routine. Make sure you understand this is not an optional item.Why? Because as you are working on overcoming your fear of not doing enough the stress is having negative impacts on your body. Self care helps counter act that negative stress. The less stress you have the more rational you can be about what you are actually accomplishing.
Hopefully these steps will help you manage the fear of not doing enough. Want help figuring out what is the belief that is causing this fear? Plus more tools to help you calm and manage your fears? Check out my course on how to overcome fear.
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